Money 5pm

The worlds sexist man is dictating to 1 of his 100s of secretaries.

“Misty I need you to take a message. It needs to say “Misty  Your Fired” Please print that out and read it in exactly 2 minutes Misty it’s important information for your career”

How Simon Stole my x factor

The year is 1989 and the place is London City.. me and Simon are a pair of nobodies. Not even a smile from Elton John as we pass him on the bus. And unless our invites got lost in the mail we will not be performing at the royal variety this year

“URG!” I groan “I can’t put up with this anymore… our life is a wreck! Britain’s got SO much talent and I can’t even get Madonna to sketch me in for a coffee”  Our bones are numb from being left in the cold icy abyss that surrounds show business. And as the sun of popularity floods down on Madonna like a waterfall of affection, the swathes of the unfashionable, untalented and unknown have been washed away by the ensuing flood! We pass a Rock-Bar and see a line of at least 100 Elvis Presley impersonators all trying out for the same spot. It’s our stop. And we join the end of the Que! Simon looks like a mess.. but still finds it easy to dishearten and criticise everyone else applying. By the time he’s done it’s just me and him.

“Thanks Simon I’m BOUND to get the gig now.. you know you could make A LOT of money putting people down like that” I say in pure joy

Simon tells me I would get the gig no matter what and that I’m the best damn Elvis Impersonator on the planet and I agree with him. With Simon at my side I feel like I could achieve anything. But from that day nothing would ever be the same again….

 

until next time!…

 

sorry to leave you on the edge seat.. but it’s a cliff hanger.. that’s the point.. that’s the idea!